Untitled

“Mommy, mommy! I want this new doll!” a little girl no more than 3 feet tall shouts, her arms flailing behind her, hair scattering over her eyes and shoulders, as she runs wildly, into the small toy section at the local Wal-mart.

Her mother, only a few paces behind, is pushing an almost full shopping cart very calmly, as she seems to know the drill by now. “Okay little one, which one would you like?” The mother smiles as she turns into the toy aisle. The mother knew it was just another day in which she gets the see the brightest smile in the world.

* * * * *

I went shopping with my mother today. Nothing special, just a normal trip to Costco. This was the first time I seemed to have a different outlook on the experience. It was crowded, as it always is. I looked around at all the people shopping, doing their (what I would expect) usual routine. It seemed as though most of them were just drudging on, taking care of their bi-monthly shopping trip. Others seemed to be happy while shopping, but I’m not sure why they were happy; it couldn’t have been the fact that they were shopping.

I came to wonder, is this it? Will my life come down to the decision between wheat and white bread? I don’t mean this with any depressive connotation, but I guess it’s a question that all of us must wonder at some point. In this great vast universe, what is my role, and more importantly, what is the point of that role?

The worldwide cycle of life seems to be basically the same. Be grown by parents, do some self growing, find someone to grow old with, then grow your own as the cycle repeats itself. I can only imagine other lifestyles, full of adventure, full of mystery and marvel. Ones devoted to travelling and exploring the world and its inhabitants. Ones dedicated to exhausting the lifestyles of many different cultures. In a sense, living life to experience something other than monotony. But at the same time, where does that lead? The excitement is bound to end at some point anyways, and then what?

I know where I’m headed, what path I plan on taking in my attempts to make a mark on this planet. I’m just not sure exactly if this is what I want to do, at this point in my life at least. Maybe everyone around my age wonders this exact thing. I’m young at heart and very young at mind, and the world is potentially my oyster.

I plan on getting married sometime between soon and eventually. I also definitely want to have my own little one(s). As mentioned above, follow in the circle. And I guess my answer to the great existential question might just be this. That the mundane life that we each live is the most exciting and fulfilling thing we can possibly do. Going into work everyday, something enjoyable to you; having that one special person next to you for endless years to come; and knowing exactly what will make that brightest smile emerge from your little one.

All in all, I want to thank my parents for participating in the cycle and making sure I had a great life. I love the both of you very much. If I am able to do even a fraction of the job that you have done, I’ll be very proud of myself.

(Now that I think about it, I was a lot like that little girl from the anecdote in the beginning, except I was running towards the Ninja Turtle action figures).